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VITRUVIUS
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7 januarja, 2016

10: KAKO STE SPLOH ZDRŽALI BREZ MENE?

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‘- Kdo je ta tip Stirling?

– Lili Sanela?

– Ne govori s tabo.

– Na vertigu ni nobenega zadetka, samo poštni predal v Stirlingu. Kako creepy-ass moraš biti, da nimaš na vertigu nobenih zadetkov?

– Kaj je to poštni predal?

– FML, resno.

– Poštni predal je vintidž zadeva, kamor so ti včasih pošiljali fizična pisma, če nisi navedel fizičnega naslova.

– Mogoče je psevdonim.

– Mogoče dela za FBI, Robin the Dobbin.

– Mogoče pa vi ne bi bili taki stalkerji, ampak uporabni pripravniki v biroju.

– Za kar nas konec koncev (NE) plačajo.

– Daj povej, kdo je Stirling, Lili Sanela?

– O njem ne govorimo.

– Na družinskem drevesu piše S.S. Stirling, tako da najbrž ni psevdonim.

– Če je na vašem precioznem drevesu, verjetno mora biti član družine.

– Ne reče se precioznem.

– A ti že imaš gradbeno za sinagogo?

– Že od včeraj. Od tazoprne na enoti. Kdo lahko trdi, da alkohol ni resničen navdih.

– Alma je rekla, da ne bo izgovorila niti njegovega imena.

– Kot da ti je že kdaj kaj uporabnega povedala.

– Roudavski tudi ne.

– Kaj pa on ve.

– Kakšni sifilitični kurbi sta vidva.

– Ne treba, da si groba.

– Kaj pa res on ve, saj je samo prišlek, tako kot mi.

– Razen Lili Sanele.

– Poročil se bo z mojo sestro.

– Nedvomno se bodo zdaj delovni pogoji v tej snobistični luknji še izboljšali.

– Ni luknja, ampak najboljši biro v štirih državah.

– Nehvaležni ste.

– Tako je.

– Vsi ste proti meni, samo zato, ker se pišem Hagenbohm.

– Ne moreš imeti samih prednosti in nobenega minusa.

– Pusti jo, Bram.

– Robin bi rad v družino.

– Pusti me, Robin.

Na dan, ko Klementino Hagenbohm odpeljejo v strogo varovan ženski pripor, od katerega naj bi (glede na zverinsko naravo umora) brez možnega plačila varščine odšla na sojenje za umor svojega moža Daniela Hagenbohma, biro Vitruvius uradno prevzame novi vodja, neznanka, bratranec Stirling. Za dober začetek dneva v osrednji pisarni zbere partnerje, pripravnike in piarovko Lu, ki jo je pripeljal iz podjetja za izdelavo gumbov. Croissantov in drobnega peciva za zajtrk ne prinese, tako da se nihče ne omehča. Prav tako odsotna je oseba, ki je za to, da prostor kipi od negativne energije, kriva: ker se Ludvik Hagenbohm ni mogel odločiti, ali bi se udeležil aretacije Klementine ali uvodnega nastopa Stirlinga (v trenutku zlobe je višji inšpektor Paddy Scotch za aretacijo določil ravno prvi ponedeljek v mesecu), zdaj oba dogodka spremlja doma na CocoBlueju, kar se mu zdi “bolj resnično.”

Čeprav misli Mariele Žašler večino časa v življenju okupira Mariela Žašler, Mariela Žašler le ni tako slepa, da ne bi videla, kakšno silovito sovraštvo morajo čutiti srca Hagenbohmov, da ga celo njihovi izurjeni obrazi pred novim šefom tako slabo skrivajo.

S.S. Stirling se ne meni za sovražno ozračje.

“Dragemu Ludviku sem dolžan veliko zahvalo za zaupanje. Po neštetih slabih izkušnjah in krivicah, ki so me v življenju doletele po krivdi imena Hagenbohm, je bila njegova poteza seveda nujna. A Hagenbohm je edina družina, ki sem jo kadarkoli poznal. Rad vas imam in vem, da me tudi obožujete. Tako da: kako ste sploh zdržali brez mene?”

Piše: Eva Mahkovic

Riše: Eva Mlinar

Vitruvius_10-mala

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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